Thank you for your interest in the game. Your application has been reviewed and the mods would like to request revisions in the following areas:
- First note, your character as a native of this universe is a (Native) not an (OU) which would stand for characters from canon directly. For example, Grif exactly as he occurs within RvB.
- The personality needs some expansion. It is quite brief and doesn't allow the reader a glimpse into the character's manner of thinking. We would like to see more analysis of the character's thought process. For instance, what suits her to medicine? Is it a passion, a vocation, or does she do it because it satisfies something in her?
- The backstory requires more information. It tells nothing between her getting into a medical school to disappearing with no explanations. What lead to her 'disappearance.' Was that something forced upon her or something she choose? Has she attempted to contact her family? Why Adaptive? When she arrived on Adaptive, why did she go to Jimmy (it seems you may be running on an assumption of the Transponser, but that only affects non-native characters and yours is currently written as a native)? And why does she resort to mercenary work?
Feel free to ask for any clarification you may need on these topics and thank you again for your interest.
Revision Needed
Thank you for your interest in the game. Your application has been reviewed and the mods would like to request revisions in the following areas:
- First note, your character as a native of this universe is a (Native) not an (OU) which would stand for characters from canon directly. For example, Grif exactly as he occurs within RvB.
- The personality needs some expansion. It is quite brief and doesn't allow the reader a glimpse into the character's manner of thinking. We would like to see more analysis of the character's thought process. For instance, what suits her to medicine? Is it a passion, a vocation, or does she do it because it satisfies something in her?
- The backstory requires more information. It tells nothing between her getting into a medical school to disappearing with no explanations. What lead to her 'disappearance.' Was that something forced upon her or something she choose? Has she attempted to contact her family? Why Adaptive? When she arrived on Adaptive, why did she go to Jimmy (it seems you may be running on an assumption of the Transponser, but that only affects non-native characters and yours is currently written as a native)? And why does she resort to mercenary work?
Feel free to ask for any clarification you may need on these topics and thank you again for your interest.